First, strive to determine a minimum of two different feelings you’ll be able to determine with. If your preliminary thought is “I’m stressed,” what are two different choices that emulate the way you’re feeling in that second? Remember to be particular and granular; that manner, you’ll be capable to get to the foundation of what you’re feeling, reasonably than slapping on an enormous “stress” label with no actionable methods to deal with it.
Once you determine these underlying feelings, “No longer are you stuck in, ‘I am stressed,’” says David. “You are ‘I am exhausted, so I need greater levels of self care.’ It’s very different from just ‘stressed.’”
The subsequent step for coping with these feelings, is to find what values the emotion is pointing to: “We tend not to have strong emotions about things we don’t care about,” says David, and your tough emotions can make clear what’s essential to you. For instance, in case you are lonely, do you yearn for social connection? Are you lacking deep conversations with your partner?
David says you’ll be able to even write down the emotion on a bit of paper, flip it over, and word what values you assume that emotion is signaling. Think of it as a roadmap for what your feelings are really making an attempt to inform you. After all, each emotion—even those that make you uncomfortable—have a objective.